prayer - a great adventure

This week I was reading some reflections of one of my favourite authors, Henri Nouwen. In his book The Only Necessary Thing - Living a Prayerful Life, he was speaking about the nature of prayer. He said:

Prayer is often considered a weakness, a support system, which is used when we can no longer help ourselves. But that is only true when the God of our prayers is created in our own image and adapted to our own needs and concerns. When, however, prayer makes us reach out to God, not on our own but on God's terms, then prayer pulls away from self-preoccupations, encourages us to leave familiar ground, and challenges us to enter into a new world which cannot be contained within the narrow boundaries of our mind or heart. Prayer, therefore, is a great adventure because the God with whom we enter into a new relationship is greater than we are and defies all our calculations and predictions.

As I reflected on my own life of prayer, I wondered how often I come to prayer on my own terms instead of on God's terms. I think this is especially true when I think I know how God should answer my prayers. I assume I will see God answer in a certain way, instead of coming to prayer as a "great adventure."

The other day I was praying about a situation in my life and asking God to lead and guide me, and I realized that in fact, I had it all figured out how God should answer. Pretty amazing, hey?! :) Then I remembered what Nouwen had said about prayer being a great adventure because of the God to whom we pray - and I felt God say to me, "Jen, just let me work out the details...I have it planned out even better than you could imagine!" I humbly replied, "Oh right, YOU are God for a reason!"

I need to continually come to God in prayer in order to be with him, to grow in my relationship with him, to commune with him. I need to come as one who is ready for a great adventure, because I serve a God who is bigger than the puny ideas in my mind or heart. What a privilege to come and reach out to him in all things!

SPF 100 +

Here's a fun comic someone sent me this week...kind of helps you make it through the rainy "summer" days :)

Ordination

This past Sunday I had the privilege of being ordained as a priest in the Anglican Coalition in Canada. It was a wonderful celebration and I am so thankful for the all the friends and family who were able to be there. It still feels somewhat surreal, but as I look back on the ordination service, I feel the weightiness of the responsibility I now have and at the same time the freedom that comes because I do not bear any of this alone. As the bishop and other priests layed their hands on my head, I could definitely feel the weightiness! But as I stood up I felt a lightness as I looked at those around me in support, and also felt the presence of the Spirit holding me up. As my good friend and mentor, Kathy King, reminded me in her sermon, I am not the chief shepherd - that job has already been taken. My role is to point others to Jesus, the Shepherd. I must focus on my relationship with Jesus and lead others to follow him as well.

This lesson was quickly tested as I learned on Sunday night that I would be officiating at a funeral later this week. One of my first reactions included a bit of fear - but, I have never done this before! What if I mess up something? I was reminded in prayer that this is an opportunity to look to the Chief Shepherd and point others to him. My competency or experience is not the issue.

The Scripture reading chosen for the funeral service is Matthew 11.25-30, which ends with the well known words: "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

This is what one commentator said about these verses and what it means to follow Jesus:

"In the quest to learn from Jesus how to live God’s truth, it is critical to remember that Jesus’ disciples can also turn his yoke into an unbearable burden unless we consciously recognize that discipleship to Jesus is not essentially a religious obligation. Rather, ours is an intimate relationship with the One who calls, “Come to me” and “learn from me.” As complicated as life may become, discipleship is at heart simply walking with Jesus in the real world and having him teach us moment by moment how to live life his way."

As I embark on this new journey as a priest in Christ's church, I am reminded of his invitation to come and learn from him, to walk with him, and to lead others in the same. It is not about religious ceremonies or rules, but about an intimate relationship with a loving Shepherd.